Tuesday, January 01, 2013

Snow Sox Fielding Practice Begins

Gnome, Alaska

We're still 6 weeks away from the Snow Sox opening their spring training facility on Hoth, but this determined ballclub is already preparing for the season right here in Alaska. The latest series of trades has brought gold glove quality defenders Justin Headley and Tino Erstad to the infield corners. New centerfielder Cristbal Guillen is a gold glove candidate himself. They will join returning infielders Wilfredo Martin and Rey Nunez. Perhaps the biggest upgrade though, is at the catcher position. Alaska decided to turn the starting job over to defensive standout Jeff Bowman by trading slugger George Herman Frog.

Bowman is the total package on defense. He's earned raves from the pitching staff, and possesses a cannon for an arm. He's also asserting himself as a team leader as the Snow Sox arrive for fielding practice. One after another, Bowman fires snowballs right onto the 2b bag.

Yes, snowballs. For one, owner King Lewis Skywalker II, acting commissioner for life, is too cheap to purchase baseballs when snowballs are in such abundant supply. Second, manager Rewind sees a competitive advantage in training with snowballs. "Anyone can catch a baseball. But who wants to get splattered with snow over and over? It takes soft hands to catch a snowball."

Not everyone was immediately on board. Headley complained to GM Ryne "Horse" Solo and President Darth Vader that early spring training was not required in his contract. Vader replied "I am altering the contract. Pray I do not alter it further.". Though Headley in the end was happy with the reexamination of his contract, it turns out he will be due for a raise through arbitration and free agency after the season.


At 11:09 PM EST, Anonymous Peter Gammons said...

As everyone knows, this practice was practically onvented by Buddy Dervish in the Elvin Leagues. You are such a fat yoda. You make me sick.


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