Transactions 2-13-2011

Hawaii trades OF Carlos Merejo, pitcher Clint Kennedy, and a 2nd round 2012 draft pick to Green Day for outfielder Mike Dickerson. The move is primarily a salary dump for Hawaii, as they won't have to pay Merejo 6 million dollars next year.

Hawaii uses the savings to sign catcher Bruce Berano to a 2 year, 14 million dollar contract. Berano was mostly a DH last year, and really can't throw anymore, but he is still considered a solid handler of pitchers.

New York Cobra has announced that Jaret Benser, the team's top reliever for the last 3 seasons, will move back into the rotation for 2011. This leaves the closer job in the hands of either Jon Papelbrad or Rudiger Rocker. Both are cross-eyed, retarded Brad-like extraterrestrials.

Hawaii has been rumored to have made a contract offer to Anakin Solo as well, but no deal is imminent.